Yo, Srini, I tried to keep my mouth shut while reading your sorry-not-sorry-eulogy, but I can't do it anymore.

I see all these people cheering you up for coming back but nobody is saying what really needs to be said. And that’s just sad.

The fact is, you're a lousy drug dealer. There, I’ve said it.

You’ve been doing to us what you did to Hope and Lizzy. You’ve been feeding us with the good stuff from your stash of writing and then you played dead. For how long? Like 8 months?

We were all dying to read you over here! Now you’re back and we’re supposed to have hope we’ll get to read you more often?

They say if you wish to be remembered you should leave a lot of debts. You’ve found a different way to be remembered – write stories to die for and then disappear.

I guess I was trying to say I’m thrilled to read you again. Belated happy birthday!

P.S. If you do hear from Lizzy, I expect her to tell you afterlife is no more of a nonsense than this life, just struggling to push up the daisies again and again…